HA! Have you seen that picture being passed around, the one with the picture of the two kids standing in the middle of a living room where they apparently just finished painting the flat screen TV and leather sofa with white primer? It’s appropriately titled “Times When It’s Okay To Use The F Word”.

Yeah, we have days like that. When you find Perfectville, let me know. I try to keep an upbeat perspective when I write my blog posts, but there are moments when I want to sell the whole package on eBay. I’ve even wrote the perfect ad copy in my head:

FOR SALE: One incredibly small, unbelievably disorganized house, fully furnished with a truly lived-in look, complete with two argumentative kids, one exhausted husband, two needy dogs, a few ungrateful cats, a cranky rabbit, and a weedy yard. All can be yours for a low, low price!

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I guess this is a popular way to do things now - my antivirus software is the same way. I had to purchase a separate license key and subscription for each computer with no price break for being a repeat customer. The only way you get a discount on multiple purchases is if you order 10 or more, which only a business would need. Special pricing is also offered to nonprofits and educational groups. It’s individual consumers who get the raw end of the deal.

Things didn’t used to be like this a few years ago, back when it wasn’t even common for people to have more than one computer. Today, more than ever, it makes sense to allow one user to have the ability to install software on an additional computer without having to pay for it twice. Because after, it’s not like I’m cloning myself here - I am still ONE user. Lots of families have a desktop and a laptop.

There are ways to certify genuine users and limit software copying between friends without having to put these punitive restrictions in place. This new policy seems like a great excuse to get consumers to buy the same product multiple times. What’s next? Will I need to buy several copies of Pirates of the Caribbean in order to watch it on more than one DVD player?

I think it’s interesting to juxtapose this development against the growing trend of free, open-source software releases. It used to be that free software wasn’t worth the time or computer space it took to install it. But now there are so many low-cost and freeware programs available that actually perform better and have more flexibility than their pricey commercial counterparts.

Think of Thunderbird versus Outlook. One is notorious for crashing, hovers about two steps behind in design and functionality, and has a zillion security problems. The other one runs smooth, is frequently updated, and isn’t plagued with security issues. Guess which one is free? Guess which one comes bundled with a bunch of other glitchy software that will cost you around $300? I’m not sure if policy makers at the companies touting steeply priced software with restrictive licensing realize that the increasing quality, diversity, and availability of freeware may very well have a detrimental effect on their sales.

In the course of speaking with the Nero service rep I realized it’s ridiculous to pay $200 just to run a DVD burning program on two family-owned personal computers. I mean we’re talking about software that only has one application here. Unless it can do our laundry and visit the dentist for us it isn’t worth the price, you know? After just a brief search online I found a small set of perfectly functional tools that will do the exact same job. They cover everything we need and aren’t nearly as space hogging and bulky as programs like Nero. It cost us a grand total of zero dollars. Freeware rocks!

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We’ve all been given roles to play - my character is a French chef so I’ve had an adventure trying to find the right costume. I was able to put most of the outfit together - kitchen shoes, beret, checkered pants - but couldn’t find a chef’s jacket. I checked all the thrift stores and costume places with no luck so I started calling around to the nice restaurants until I found a place willing to lend me one for the evening. So now I am complete! Oh, I’m sorry, that should be: Maintenant je suis complet!

It promises to be a lot of fun. Chris is going as a 40s  detective. He has the whole trenchcoat with a fedora thing going on - it looks so natural on him! I know two of the other people who bought tickets (Susan is putting this on as part of a charity auction) and they have neat characters, too - my sister is a jazz singer and my mom is a wealthy patron of the arts.

Au revoir pour le moment mes chéris. Avoir une grande soirée!

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On another note, I came across this quote today and thought it was pretty funny:

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. - An English Professor

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In renovating the house, we tried to be forward thinking and to consider what might keep the house ‘current’ for the longest time. Most residential homes have 200 amp service, but we upgraded to 325, which is usually only given to commercial businesses. However, our boiler alone pulls 145 amps at max capacity, so we installed a bigger meter base and a separate disconnect for the boiler, which will keep that system functioning without putting a strain on the rest of the house. We also used 12-2 wire with 20 amp breakers rather than 14-2 with 15 amp breakers, as many modern conveniences require additional supply. Instead of using standard telephone wire we decided to go with CAT, which is a blue data cable that can handle phone, fax, and computer modem needs. It’s able to carry multiple streams of data at higher speeds - typically equivalent to DSL.

Hopefully by going above and beyond the standard materials and services, these things will help keep the house up to par with future supply & demand for decades to come. Although we plan to live in the house for many years, we don’t want to be faced with trying to sell a house that is already behind the curve and in needed of basic electrical or plumbing upgrades.

Drywall is going up in several rooms which is very exciting because it feels like the house is starting to be put back together! The house had blown-in insulation added several years ago and it was packed in very thick which provided excellent insulation, but unfortunately as the certain walls and ceilings were dismantled, the insulation had to be removed. R-19 formaldehyde free insulation is going in as a replacement to the blown-in fill and is providing weather proofing on exterior walls and acting as a sound barrier within interior walls and ceilings.

The kitchen design is finally coming along. I spent 3 hours with a guy from our cabinet company while he measured and remeasured the kitchen. My original design was off quite a bit which was frustrating but expected. When I measured the kitchen to draw up the initial layout, I had a lot of obstacles to work around such as the built-in cabinets and the chimney (all of which are now gone). The wall between the existing kitchen and the room we are expanding into was still in place which made accurate measuring difficult, but it was removed by the time the cabinet guy came.

I have never agonized over a room so much in my life! It earned the name Kitchen From Hell because it’s architecturally complex and all the old house charm (which exists from back when they didn’t have kitchens like we do today) made it impossible to come up with a simple design. But I hope to have the new plans finalized by the end of next week. Speaking of the kitchen, we’ve picked out our cabinets so at least that has been taken care of! I’ll post pictures of them later.

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Me: You wanted to be named Paris? Why?

Mehalje: Because I think it’s a lovely name!

Chris: Well, I like Mehalje better than Paris.

Mehalje: Could you just use Paris as my first name and Mehalje as another one of my names?

Alaska (just tuning into the conversation): Mehalje is your middle name?

Mehalje: No, Mehalje is my username.

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“What does she mean?” you say. Well, our family is in a state of transition right now. We’ve been slowing edging into several major projects, embracing different philosophies, and exploring new paths (how would one sum up all those things?) and the changes have intensified lately, requiring a great time of our time & energy.

It occurred to me the other day that I’ve existed under a heavy fog for a while - just very disorganized and unfocused. Demands have been coming in from all sides and I’ve been trying to deal with them as best I can, but the pressure built up so slowly over the past two years that I didn’t notice I was overloading myself and experiencing serious burnout until it was all just too much! I think I kind of shut down, like a self-protection mechanism took hold or something.

Now that I’m starting to get my bearings again, I’ve forced myself to take a step back and reevaluate. I’ve noticed how out of whack things have been! Rather than working towards the changes we really want to make, we’ve been focusing on the arbitrary stuff! The things that shouldn’t take priority have been getting my attention while the things that really matter have been slid to the backburner. I’ve been doling out my energy and time to many worthy endeavors, but in doing so I’ve stretched myself too far. The old adage of ‘family comes first’ needs to be applied here.

Finally, I haven’t been acting in harmony with the realistic demands facing us, such as the amount of work that still lies ahead and the determination and effort it will take to get through these transitions - both physically and mentally.

I’m certainly not the only one struggling under the weight of these things. DH has had equal demands of his own to shoulder, as well as the shared issues that affect our family. I think we’ve both suffered from a case of “ignore it and maybe it will go away”. In addition, our children have their own concerns and ideas. We’ve all had our patience tested by the proverbial dangling carrot that’s been just ever so slightly out of reach for what seems like far too long. Ah, the growing pains of family life!

But now, having realized these problems, we’re determined to go in a direction that’s both meaningful and productive for the long-term health of our family. We want to refocus, find a way to recharge, and then get moving, even if it’s slowly at first. Striving to make desires and possibilities turn into realities is one of the challenges of leading an ever-evolving life and being open to improving and refining our ways of living.

Lots of changes have been on the horizon and most are interconnected, so that explains why they all seem to be happening at once, but it’s nonetheless been a lot for me to handle. I hesitated to say “deal with” because these are welcome, positive changes. I guess it just takes a certain amount of energy and determination to get through any transition! I have lots more to write but I’ll save it for another post. Writing helps me sort out my thoughts and prioritize my goals. I’m able to see things in a clearer light, which makes life more manageable. I need to get back in the habit!

Anyways, hopefully this post will reassure everyone that I haven’t fallen off the face of the planet or been abducted by aliens. I’ve just been caught up in life and haven’t had enough time or focus to write lately. I hope everyone is enjoying the new year so far! I can’t believe it will be February soon. Which reminds me that I’ll be turning 30 next month. Yep, the big 3-0.

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Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

And a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only “America” in the Western Hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or lack thereof, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the wishee.

(Public Notice As Required By Law: By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal, it is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and is limited to replacement of these wishes or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher. Please note: Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the recipient is not directly observing this greeting, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state. Important notice to users: The entire physical universe, including this greeting, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this greeting in that universe cannot be guaranteed.)

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The Organic Rebellion has “conventional” agriculture on the run in this intergalactic parody set “not long ago in a supermarket not so far away…”

Will you join the rebellion?

May the farm be with you!

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Chris: I wish I could help you with that, I really do.

Me: No, seriously. Haven’t you heard about the new bill that was passed? You’re now required by law to give me a massage on demand.

Chris: Yeah… unfortunately that doesn’t go into effect until November 29th.

Me: Oh really? Well, that’s tomorrow so I think I need a preview, you know, to test your skills.

Chris: You misunderstand. That’s November 2007. It goes into effect next year.

Me: I see… but if it takes a whole year to implement then you probably need that time to practice, right? I’m giving you a great opportunity to improve PR and restore employee moral…

Chris: Yeah, I don’t think so. That bill’s probably going to be repealed. It’s in review by committee right now. I’ll have to get back to you on that.

Me: [sigh]…nevermind.

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This analogy was left by a signer of the petition against the reauthorization of No Child Left Behind. I think it efficiently points out the irrational thinking behind the testing frenzy that NCLB has mandated. A mother who posted about this petition in one of my email groups wrote:

It was partially because of NCLB that I pulled my child out of public school. All the schools care about is testing. My son’s school actually spent 2 months prior to the standardized tests just studying for the test. They did nothing else for those 2 months. Once the testing was over, they pretty much stopped teaching for the rest of the year since their job of preparing the students for the test was over.

Now, I don’t know that this petition will do a bit of good. But I signed it anyways. While I feel our particular form of institutionalized schooling is irreparably flawed, I am realistic enough to acknowledge that our country’s approach to education isn’t going to change any time soon. For now the only hope is to seek improvements within the existing framework of our school system.

NCLB is one of the worst things to be forced upon teachers and students in recent history. It has reduced the ability of teachers who care deeply about children to use their gifts in the classroom. It has squelched curiosity and creativity. It’s brought love of learning and pursuit of the arts to a grinding halt. Everyone in our country is affected by the quality and effectiveness of public schools, homeschoolers and private schoolers included. Children and committed educators are being deeply affected by this law and not at all in a positive way.

You can read full text at Petition Online. The aim is to gather at least a million signatures. Here is a bit more food for thought, as written by signers of the petition…

NCLB is destroying education, teachers and students while making money on the tools - one of the reasons it was designed. Another reason was to produce people who are unable to think or problem solve. Makes it easier to control them. NCLB is criminal. - Dr. Michelle Kassorla

This law appears to ignore what we know about how children learn best in our classrooms. - Patricia Richard-Amato

This act killed thinking in the classroom - it is why I left the classroom after 23 years of teaching elementary school. - Karen Kolar

The No Child Left Behind Act will leave American education in shambles…blaming teachers, threatening students, and undermining the very idea that it’s FUN to learn! - Mary Jo Firth Gillett

NCLB is a tragic thing that has been done to children; and to education in general, and has set back American education at least 50 years. - William M. Stone

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But two short postings did catch my eye and I felt compelled to respond.

My husband’s Aunt is an “unschooler”… her children are sharply behind when it comes to every subject… I personally find it to be a very irresponsible thing to do. Our society requires education and society benefits from it. Not everything is learned as a side effect of living. That’s ridiculous.

If something is not learned through living, then what purpose does it serve? If, through the course of living my life, I do not encounter a situation where I must have knowledge or skill concerning ability X, then why do I need to have ability X? If I do happen to find myself in a circumstance where I need or want ability X, then I can take the opportunity to learn it.

If one is open to learning new things as they are dictated by interest or necessity, then learning will come naturally as it proves useful or desirable. It is quite a waste of time to fill one’s head up with information that might or might not prove useful at some distant time in the future. There is already so much knowledge and skill to be learned and mastered at any given time because it is required by circumstances which present themselves on a daily basis.

Underlying purplepenny’s writing is the (incorrect) assumption that unschoolers do not seek out opportunities but only learn that which falls directly into their lap. Children who have the freedom and support to follow their own interests do not spend all their days just sitting idly and waiting for something to knock them on their noggin. Behind the philosophy of unschooling is a love of learning and desire to seek out knowledge, which all children have naturally. Unschoolers (and other homeschoolers) give their children the gifts of time and opportunity, which empowers children by allowing them to make use of these natural characteristics.

Additionally, nobody has perfect knowledge and ability. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Nobody knows everything about every topic conceivable by man. I have many skills but cannot, off the top of my head, solve complicated algebraic equations. For one, math is not my strong suit (lack of desire). Secondly, I have not had reason to exercise this skill (lack of necessity), so it’s pretty much fallen right out of my head.

However, if I ever find myself needing to solve complicated equations, I could certainly tackle learning it and I’m fairly confident that I’d be successful. Up until that time comes however, I will not be motivated to spend time mastering a skill I have no use for. I don’t feel that I am lacking in intelligence or ability by not having this skill, as it is not useful in my life at this time.

Life is an on-going learning process. Unschoolers are simply experiencing that process organically and at an earlier age than most of us do. Unschooling is not a perfect process by current academic standards, but then again neither are the very teaching methods that current academic standards adhere to.

There will always be gaps of knowledge, regardless of educational approach. The perceived difference between the gaps of unschoolers versus those that schooled children comes down to a comparison of who has mastered the material deemed The Most Important. But this is a subjective matter - what is The Most Important stuff to know in order to function properly will vary from child to child, depending on what is required of them to have a successful life. And success is another subjective word as well.

Public schools have decided that certain sets of information and skills are necessary, based on the very generalized needs of society as a whole. It is this generic blueprint that is taught in classrooms. In comparison, unschoolers are learning information and skills which are necessary and important to living their individual lives. If we view society as a entity which is made up of individual parts, it is clear that we each must learn to function as specialized parts of the whole.Unschoolers have a jump on this. And there is no reason to assume that they do not also master the basic requirements perceived to be necessary to the whole.

gr8ful4him wrote: This is the first I’ve actually heard of “unschooling” and it sounds ridiculous! I suppose it’s a part of the whole self esteem idea… if we don’t test them, they can’t “fail” and then they won’t think poorly of themselves! In life, we are tested daily. If we have a job and don’t complete it satisfactorily, we are in jeopardy of losing that job… it’s a test of sorts. To raise a child in an environment that they are never tested and only learn what comes to them as a side effect of living is to be neglectful of that child’s well-being for the future.

Yes, we are tested daily in life. But most of life’s little tests arrive through living and are coupled with natural consequences. For example, if we want to learn to drive then we must be willing to pursue training and become proficient enough to pass a test. If we pass our test, we are issued a license. If we fail, we are not. This process was arrived at through desire or necessity and the consequences for passing or failing are directly related to the task.

It should be noted that testing at school is arrived at artificially and the immediate consequences of success or failure are rarely related to the tested skill. These tests are not good indicators of actual ability or skill level. Nor can they accurately measure the desire or motivation of the student. Additionally, they often have poorly worded questions which produce confusion and anxiety.

gr8ful4him uses an example of job performance, which again is a test that is arrive at naturally with consequences that correspond directly to the tested skill. If one is motivated to keep their job, they will perform at the necessary level. If one desires a raise or promotion,they will perform above the expected level.

Given that most of us have our abilities and desires challenged in this manner, it is quite inaccurate to assume unschoolers don’t encounter these sorts of natural tests everyday through living, or to think that they do not experience consequences just because it is not a letter grade marked on the top of a test paper. It is also ridiculous to assert that refusal to engage in artificial testing equates to neglect.

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I bet you think I’m talking about the day when all eat too much, squabble with our relatives, and fall asleep on the couch sometime between dinner and dessert. Actually, no. I’m talking about the time of year when stores fill their displays with children’s books about Thanksgiving, the kind with sugary sweetness and inaccuracies of mythical proportions.

I must have looked at 20 books, skimming one after another in hopes of finding a somewhat legitimate recounting of the history of this day to share with the kids. I experienced total Mission Failure. Every book misrepresented the historical record, either in the text or through the accompanying illustrations. Am I really expected to buy these “educational” books for my kids? I mean come on people!

Ugh! Most of the books, rather than offering informative material, simply perpetuated the typical stereotypes of Thanksgiving - pictures of stern looking people dressed starkly in black and white, complete with shoe buckle belts and pointy hats, dishing out pumpkin pie and roasted potatoes to equally absurd looking Indians. Not exactly what I want to spend my money on. Nor can I, in good conscience, buy books which depict beaming children gathered around a giant table in the woods eating cranberry sauce with spoons.

In the end I bought a simple Mercer Mayer book about gratitude. Surprisingly, it captured the meaning of Thanksgiving better than any of the books written purposefully for this holiday. So, in honor of this mythical day represented by oddly clothed people and happy cartoon turkeys, I present a bit of educational holiday reading. Enjoy!

• Debunking Myths and Misconceptions on Paradise Found

• Top 10 Myths About Thanksgiving by History News Network

• The Pilgrims Watched Football by Martha Brockenbrough on MSN

• Thanksgiving: Memory, Myth & Meaning on Plimoth Plantation

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Children’s Books

The Shortest Day
by Wendy Pfeffer
0525469680

Introduces the significance of Solstice from a spiritual and historical viewpoint, as well as covering scientific information. A section at the end of the book offers a reading list, activities for young and older children, and ideas for celebrating.

The Winter Solstice
by Ellen Jackson
0761302972

Discusses the customs and traditions associated with Solstice in ancient times and today. The author touches on the historical observances in Scandinavia, Rome, Peru, and Native American ceremonies and notes the Solstice celebrations which appear during observances of Christmas and Hanukkah.

Dear Rebecca, Winter Is Here
by Jean Craighead George
0064434273

Approached in the style of a storyteller, it is written as a letter from a grandmother to her young granddaughter about the sun’s journey back to fullness. This tale is narrated in gentle, playful tones and mentions the many wonders of winter. Includes extensive illustrations and an author’s note.

A Solstice Tree For Jenny
by Karen Shragg
1573929301

Jenny feels left out during the winter holiday season as she watches her neighborhood sparkle with colorful lights and decorated trees. Then she discovers Solstice and the ancient celebration of light. Families embracing a nature-based or humanist path might appreciate the parents’ discussion of why they do not have Judaeo-Christian beliefs, conveyed to child with simplicity and tolerance.

Advanced Reading

The books listed below offer further information, such as ideas for family celebrations, passages that are great for reading aloud to younger children, and stories suitable for older children and adults.

The Solstice Evergreen
by Sheryl Karas
0944031757

Yule
by Dorothy Morrison
1567184960

The Winter Solstice
by John Matthews
0835607690

The Return of the Light
by Carolyn Edwards
1569246173

Sun Stories: Tales From Around The World
Carolyn Edwards
006250276X

General Resources

The following books have activities, songs, stories, rituals, and other resources for Solstice, as well as various information on celebrations for the rest of the year. Circle Round in particular is a favorite at our house because the content is beautifully written and accessible to children of all ages.

Circle Round: Raising Children In Goddess Traditions
Starhawk, Diane Baker, Annie Hill
0553378058

Circle Round and Sing: Songs For Family Celebrations (CD)
by Annie Hill
B00004TATV

Celebrating The Great Mother: A Handbook of Earth-Honoring Activities
by Cait Johnson
0892815507

Aisha’s Moonlit Walk: Stories & Celebrations For The Pagan Year
by Anika Stafford
1558964851

Bliss & Peace
- Susan

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I’ve compiled what I think is a great list of books for wintertime! The list includes titles for lessor-known holiday celebrations, literature about seasonal observances, craft and activity guides, books on winter science topics, as well as teaching resources. Over the next several days I will be posting a collection of books relating to a particular theme - such as Solstice, Folktales, Seasonal Delights, Cycles In Nature, Cultural Celebrations, etc.

These books can be ordered online, purchased from your local bookstore, or checked out from the library. I have only selected books which are currently available from multiple sources. Although there are many wonderful older titles, I have chosen not to include those that are out of print or otherwise hard to find. I want this list to be accessible to everyone.

In selecting books I gave careful consideration to the “wholeness” of each book. I searched for books that present themselves as timeless treasures and are worth inclusion in family traditions. The storyline, author notes, and illustrations all had a bearing on the overall quality of each book. In keeping with this approach, I decided not to include commercially-licensed character or cartoon books. There are many of these available, but they do not contain the artful illustrations and thoughtful content I was seeking.

Each book listed in this series will includes the title, author, isbn, cover picture, and a short review. You can use the ISBN to look the book up on your favorite site - be it Barnes & Noble, Fetchbook, or Alibris - to read further reviews and find the best price for each title. In many cases, Amazon provides the option of viewing a few inside pages, which can be helpful in determining if the book is suitable for your family.

I feel it’s necessary to note why I have not included books specific to Christmas. Since it’s observed by millions around the world there are literally thousands of books about Christmas, which are readily accessible and easy to find this time of year (or all year long if you are ordering online). Christmas dominates the holiday landscape in retail outlets during winter. You can find everything from cookbooks to children’s picture books that are themed around this holiday. Bookstores dedicate dozens of shelves and displays to these titles.

On the other hand, families who prefer a secular, multicultural, or nature-based approach to the winter season have a difficult time finding materials. In my experience it is especially hard to find books suitable for sharing with the whole family, so that was my focus.

My hope is that the posts contained within this Winter Books series help other families celebrate the joys of the season in their own special way.

Posts Within This Series:

• Solstice and Yule
• more to come!

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1) A shooting star fell beside me while I was walking down a path at my grandparents’ house. I think I was about 14. A bright light caught the corner of my eye and I looked up to see a small ball of fire hurtling at me. Dumbstruck, I just stood there and watched it fall into a pile of leaves, which briefly caught fire. I dug around to see if I could find anything, but all that was left were a few charred leaves and several hot pebbles that looked like normal earth rock.

2) I had both of my children before getting married. I was against marriage for a long time. In fact when I started dating Chris my mom felt the need to pull him to the side and ask him, “You do know that she’s not going to marry you, right?” Well, we did in fact get married. But not until after we had both our children and went on our honeymoon. I like doing things backwards, lol. There are many reasons why I hesitated to get married: I don’t feel the need to prove commitment to a relationship through legal means, I disagree with the conventional role of husband and wife, and because I am deeply concerned that the freedom to marry has not been granted to all citizens of our country.

3) I gave both of my children two middle names. We rarely ever use them, but they have special meanings. For example, one of my daughter’s middle names, Surahtah, is Hindu and it roughly translates as “the transcendent joy experienced by parents during conception”. In other words, it means she’s been loved since she was conceived.

4) Okay, now for a secret confession that only people closest to me know. I love Friends. Yes, the NBC tv show. I know, it ended, but I still love it all the same. I have all 10 seasons on DVD and I’ve probably watched each episode at least a zillion times. I could blame this on the fact that we gave up cable and that occasionally I like to have something on in the background. I play Friends when I’m doing other things, like reading or blogging. I cannot write or think or read when there is absolute silence. People seem to have either loved it or hated the show. I think it was fabulously witty and extremely well written. I love all the inside jokes, the ones that you only understood if you knew the show well. I grew to love the characters. And yes, I cried during the final episode. Okay, there. My secret is out. Please don’t throw things at me.

5) I skipped a grade in high school and I am forever grateful for this. I actually wanted to learn while in school, which was a challenge because of all the politics, mind games, and fighting. I think I was the only kid in my class that read the textbooks for fun and loved going to the library. I didn’t quite fit in with any particular group. I wasn’t athletic or preppy and I wasn’t a cheerleader or on the debate team. I ended up hanging out with all the other kids who didn’t fit in. I was quite happy to get the hell out of there as soon as possible. I’ve never been to a class reunion and don’t have plans on going anytime in the future. The only person I’ve remained in touch with over the years is my best friend Jenn, whom I met my senior year.

6) I’ve been the owner of a partially finished home for two years now. TWO YEARS. And we still aren’t living there. It was built circa 1870 and has great Victorian bones. But it needs lots of work to bring it into the 21st century. There are days when I ask myself if I was certifiably insane for even thinking about buying it. And yet we did. The mantra I’ve been repeating for the last 745 days is: I can’t wait to move. I’m getting tired of hearing myself say it. The kids will have a a real yard, we’ll have space for our library, err… homeschooling supplies, and I’ll be able to walk three feet without stepping on a small child or furry animal. It seems like a distant dream.

7) I remember my first few moments of life in the world. I was born in Anchorage, Alaska in the middle of the night during a snowstorm (go figure). I can remember the blurry faces of my mom and the nurse and a vague image of the darkness of the window behind my mother’s hospital bed. I blame Alaska for making me a night owl and screwing up my internal clock. My parents had to put aluminum foil on the windows at night to keep the sunlight out. I rarely ever wear a jacket, even in the winter. I haven’t bought a coat in years. I’m not sure if that’s due to my general strangeness or from being acclimated to Alaskan weather. It was not unheard of to have temperatures fall to 30 below zero. My husband freaks out at the mere thought of cold weather. He hates Virginia winters and wants to move to the tropics. Fat chance getting him on a cruise to the Inside Passage any time soon.

My favorite food in the world is Japanese. I could eat it every day. I love hibachi grill and anything dipped in shrimp sauce. I like Spider Maki (soft shell crab sushi). I could eat my weight in tempura vegetables and fried tofu with spicy sweet sauce. Yum. My kids dig Japanese food, too. They love twisted rolls (steamed, puffy rice rolls) and they eat sushi as well. If we won the lottery I’d hire someone to cook this stuff all day long. I’d be fat as a pig. But then again, I could probably afford a personal trainer and a plastic surgeon.

9) Each May I go to UU Womenspirit, held in the mountains of North Carolina. I look forward to it all year long. It’s just about the most wonderful place on earth. I laugh so much my body aches and there are always some happy tears of gratitude and joy as well. Womenspirit is an inclusive, vibrant, peaceful space for women. Twice a year (another retreat held is in the fall) women from all over come together to form an intentional community. It’s the only time I’ve ever felt completely 100% accepted and loved outside of my own crazy family. It’s a safe haven, a respite, a wonderful life-affirming experience. I’d love to share it with all the women in my life, and I plan to bring my daughter when she comes of age.

10) In December I’m hitting the road to the Florida Keys. I’m going camping with the family. We’re escaping the winter stress to celebrate the holidays island style. It’ll be the first time my son sees the ocean, he’s already so excited. While everyone back home freezes their tookus off, we’ll be sipping margaritas on the beach. Cheers!

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But despite all rational thinking, my neighbor decided it was a great time to mow his lawn. He carefully covered every square inch of his yard, going around and around on his riding lawn mower. In the freezing cold, bundled up like an Eskimo. I was tempted to grab a cup of hot chocolate and watch just for entertainment’s sake.

If that wasn’t strange enough, I stepped outside to see Chris off to work and we noticed the strong smell of watermelons. It was unmistakable… it was as if a truck hauling watermelons had wrecked in our driveway. We cannot figure out how or why the air was scented like giant summer fruit for several hours today.

And to top things off, one of our computers has weird issues. The kids have a game called Insanaquarium that has decided to play even when it’s not playing… by which I mean that even when the game is turned off and not running (I’ve doubled checked and even did the control+alt+delete thing) the sound of the game is still playing through the speakers. Their computer has been possessed by bubbling oysters and a knife-wielding octopus.

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I remember the days when shopping was fun. I remember when motherhood was but a faint blip on the radar. Those were the days of browsing slowly through racks of pretty things, back when I lacked fear of white clothing and could contain all my essentials in an itty bitty handbag.

In those days no one gave me sideways looks of pity and concern as they carefully avoided coming within arm’s reach of my very civilized, exceedingly well-behaved, polite children. Back then I didn’t have to tell my son twenty-six times to please, please, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT’S SACRED, put down the pink fuzzy slippers. I didn’t have to call out my daughter’s name in barely-suppressed terror each she disappeared in the two seconds in took me to look down at a price tag.

Ah, the joys of shopping with kids. I just want to say that I really, really, really understand why they make leashes for kids.

Old Navy was having a sale today. Okay, they’re always have a sale. But today was an exceptionally good one on children’s clothing. And everyone within fifty miles had zeroed in on it. It looked like the type of madness usually witnessed on that Holy Day of shopping - the day after Thanksgiving, when people wake up at 4am to stand in line outside for hours, waiting to make the mad dash to get their hands on a $50 tv.

The store was crowded with frenzied shoppers. Clothing was everywhere but on the racks. Those cute display tables of t-shirts? Demolished. Women were grabbing piles of shirts and heaping them into their carts and then sorting through them as fast as possible. One lady, who was rocking a crying infant while simultaneously trying to soothe a fussy toddler, gave me a weak smile when my son burst into tears because I wasn’t trekking back to the car to retrieve his videogame. “I swear moms should be paid to shop,” she said. Amen.

I left exhausted, thirsty, and in need of a back massage. I believe I had a small nervous breakdown at some point. The kids were shell shocked. But we were alive, with limbs intact, and only slightly bruised. And we got the job done.

Scorecard: $500 worth of winter clothing for $90. A hard-earned victory.

Favorite find: my daughter’s new pair of cute black boots, stolen purchased for three dollars.

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I am however, still alive. Gotta love that part, right?

I took a break to get away on a family vacation (to a place with no Internet service - what the hell was I thinking?) and never fully made my way back here. Oh, I tried several times but I found myself sitting in front of the laptop staring at the screen for ten minutes before I remembered I was actually suppose to be doing something. More often than not at night, when I usually blog, I’ve had about the same amount of wit and energy as a wilted celery stick.

We are finally launching the major phase of our 1870 house renovation, a project that has been in the works for nearly two years. That’s the big news. It’s been the focus of my time and energy these last few months. The work starts in full swing next week. I’d like to celebrate properly by consuming impressive amounts of alcohol, but I can’t seem to find the strength to lift the bottles and pour. Someone please send me a barmaid.

I’ve been working on several posts behind the scenes, I just need to find a few quiet moments to finish them when I’m not feeling scattered in twenty-six directions. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, so I’ll be returning soon. You’ve been warned.

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~~~~~~~~
Once upon a time in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat down to contemplate ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.
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The frog hopped into the princess’ lap and said: “Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.”
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“One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am. Given my charm and handsome looks, I am sure you will fall instantly in love with me.”
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“Then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, and bear my children. I am sure that you will forever feel grateful and happy doing this, for this is all that you need from life and it will give you purpose. You will find the company of my mother enjoyable, for I will be too busy pursuing my dreams to provide you with companionship and attention.”
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That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself: I don’t think so.
~~~~~~~~

[ On a more serious note, a while back I read a collection of essays concerning the myths and fantasies we embed in our children, particularly our daughters, through common childhood fairy tales. While I think these stories can be a fun, imaginative part of childhood, I’ve found many of them impart subtle messages I’m uncomfortable with.

I want my children to have strength, self respect, perseverance, and the ability to distinguish fantasy from reality. I want them to understand that they must be thoughtful of the choices they make in life and that it is up to them to create their own happiness, because it will not be handed to them with the swish of a magic wand. I also think it’s important they know not everything in real life turns out happily ever after, although that is certainly a goal worth striving for. ]

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